Welcome to One Thing Better. Each week, the editor in chief of Entrepreneur magazine (that’s me) shares one way to achieve a breakthrough at work — and build a career or company you love.
Before my wife Jen and I had kids, we traveled the world as often as we could.
Then the kids arrived, and I really missed that. So I told myself a story: One day, the kids will be old enough for sleepaway camp… and then Jen and I will go somewhere great.
I said that for 11 years. Then it finally happened. The kids are currently away (like, right now!), and Jen and I just spent last week in Portugal. It was glorious.
But as our trip wrapped up, I started to reflect upon an experience I had as a teenager: I’d look forward to something, it would happen, and then I’d feel… sad and flat and adrift.
Maybe you feel the same now, as your summer winds down. It’s common after a big trip, launch, event, or major milestone. Our joy gives way to blah.
I wondered: Why? And is there anything we can do about it?
So I spent some time researching the question. And the answer turned out to be better than I expected — not just a way to avoid the crash, but a simple rule that can fill your life with more joy going forward.
But to accomplish that, you need to understand what’s actually happening in your head…
Why we crash after so much fun
Psychologists call it the Post-Event Blues, or Post-Travel Blues, and there are many explanations for it. But here’s my favorite:
We’re not just grieving the end of the event. We’re grieving the loss of anticipating the event.
Humans crave anticipation. It allows us to live in an idealized, limitless future. Since dopamine actually peaks before an event rather than during it, anticipation acts as a psychological anchor during stressful times. We tell ourselves (and everyone we know) a story: We just need to finish X, and then we get to do Y.
So whenever we’re looking forward to something big, we’re actually creating two distinct and valuable experiences for ourselves:
- The anticipation
- The actual event
When it’s over, we understand that the event itself is done — but the anticipation is a more invisible loss, because it had been woven into our everyday lives. Now life feels emptier, and we want that feeling back.
Good news: Getting it back is easier than it sounds.
Three kinds of joyful anticipation
Our lives can’t be full of gigantic events and experiences. Who has the time, money, or energy for that?
But our brains don’t need massive events to feel anticipation. Instead, experts say there are really three kinds of events we can look forward to.
Let’s call them the Three Joyful Anticipations:
- The tiny joy. This is a small pleasure that’s always available — a morning coffee ritual, a weekly class. It’s regular and reliable.
- The mid-sized joy. This is something weeks or a month out — a concert, dinner with a friend, a weekend outing. It’s not complicated, but still feels novel.
- The huge joy. This is a major event that anchors your year — a big trip, a project finish line, a celebration. It’s what you work towards.
Now here’s the goal: Put all three of these joys onto your calendar, and constantly replenish them.
That way, when one thing ends, you’re not left in a void. You still have plenty else pulling you forward, because you literally scheduled anticipation into your life.
How it works in practice
As Jen and I wrapped up our time in Portugal, I found myself thinking about my calendar: What’s on there next? What else can I anticipate?
Fortunately for me, I had quite a lot. Plans with friends. Tickets to a show. A speaking gig. I started daydreaming about these things, even as I still enjoyed my trip. I could feel myself shifting my anticipation forward, hungry for what’s next. It made the end of Portugal feel so much easier.
I also asked myself: What do my Three Joyful Anticipations look like?
My tiny joy is an afternoon walk, which I love doing daily. My mid-sized experiences take many forms, but lately I’ve gotten into scheduling recurring meals with friends, like monthly lunches and dinners. And my huge plan is… well, we’re working on that now. During our last day abroad, Jen and I decided to visit Morocco next summer.
It’s worth pausing to itemize these for yourself. Do you have multiple forms of joy on your calendar? Are you proactively adding them? When you look ahead, what do you joyfully anticipate?
Happiness does not live exclusively in the highs. It lives in the everyday. So we must constantly give ourselves that gift of anticipation, so that there is always something to look forward to, and always something to work towards, so that we never feel like we’ve reached the end.
The future is ours to sweeten.
That’s how to do one thing better.
Join Megan Thee Stallion, Gary Vee, Robert Irvine… and me!
I’ll be emceeing (and am currently planning) an incredibly awesome event for Entrepreneur.
On October 23 in Brooklyn, I’ll be on stage with these legends — AND even better, the morning is dedicated entirely to solving your business problems.
Here’s how it works:
The personalized morning: We’ll put you in small groups of your peers, and you’ll all workshop a problem that’s holding your business back. Robert Irvine and I will move around the room, helping as well. You’ll make new friends, gain valuable insights, and leave with an action plan. Then there’s a VIP lunch.
The inspirational afternoon: I’ll talk on stage to Megan Thee Stallion and Gary Vaynerchuk, take your questions, and Robert and I will workshop more of your problems!
You can get tickets for the whole day, or just the afternoon.
Either way, use code JASON to get 20% off. And if you come, please say hi! I’ll be around all day.
